What is love? (1 John 3:16-24)

What is love? Verse 16 By this we know love, that he, Christ Jesus, laid down his life for us, and we too ought to lay down our lives for the family of God.


16 By this we know love, that he laid down his life for us, and we ought to lay down our lives for the brothers. 17 But if anyone has the world's goods and sees his brother in need, yet closes his heart against him, how does God's love abide in him? 18 Little children, let us not love in word or talk but in deed and in truth.

19 By this we shall know that we are of the truth and reassure our heart before him; 20 for whenever our heart condemns us, God is greater than our heart, and he knows everything. 21 Beloved, if our heart does not condemn us, we have confidence before God; 22 and whatever we ask we receive from him, because we keep his commandments and do what pleases him. 23 And this is his commandment, that we believe in the name of his Son Jesus Christ and love one another, just as he has commanded us. 24 Whoever keeps his commandments abides in God, and God in him. And by this we know that he abides in us, by the Spirit whom he has given us.


Love is witnessed in the humility of the incarnation. Love is witnessed in the mercy bestowed upon the leper, and the healing given to the paraplegic. Love is witnessed in the hospitality of feeding the thousands. Love is witnessed in the forgiveness to the whore. Love is witnessed in the rejoicing of a wedding in Cana. Love is witnessed in the power of commanding the storms. Love is witnessed in expelling demons. Love is witnessed in submitting to arrest. Love is witnessed in accepting guilt for a crime someone else committed. Love is witnessed in putting down a sword and picking up a cross. Love is witnessed in accepting a crown of thorns. Love is witnessed in asking for the forgiveness of those who mock. Love is witnessed in an active denial of self gratification for the sake of God's glorification. Love is witnessed in rising from the tomb and visiting those mourning.




Love was put on full display, for the realm of the living, the realm of the dead, the beings of heaven, and the powers of the air, for the principalities and authorities, that love - God’s love abides in God’s people. Love is witnessed in the life, death, and resurrection of Jesus.




Loving someone means relinquishing something. Loving someone always costs something. There was no one who ever had more to give up, than Jesus. Yet he gave it up, he gave up what was rightfully his, for the sake of a people who hated him. He endured the full weight of righteous wrath poured out on hatful evil. He endured all that, and that enduring of suffering, that laying down of his life, is exactly what John focuses on for his audience. You want to know what love is? Living our lives, as Christ lived his - laying down what is rightfully ours, for the sake of the family of God.




Many of you have shown me and my family what love is. You have put on display what it looks like to lay down your lives, prioritizes, time, resources for me and my family. You have put on display in this community what love looks like when it floods, when it’s beautiful outside, when harvest abounds and there is plenty, when pandemic strikes and illness multiplies, you have put aside your own priorities, what you could call rightfully yours, and loved this community, this part of the family of God.




You deacons have loved when the needy have come hungry, when the lost seek direction, and when the troubled need comfort. You elders have loved with your wisdom, discretion, teaching, and leadership in the midst of unforeseen challenges. You, dear church, have laid down your lives for one another, for the family of God.




We’ve all experienced hardship in one way or another in 2020. This year seems to be a year for many of us is one we will remember with a great sense of loss. As the disciple Nathanel said in John 1:46 “Can anything good come out of Nazareth?”, so too many have said “can anything good come out of 2020?”. Maybe one thing that is a good thing from 2020 is learning (albeit in a very difficult way) that loving someone means sacrificing personal freedoms or rights. We have opportunities on a daily basis to love one another in deed and in truth.




While hardships have abounded in 2020 for many, opportunities for loving one another in deed and truth have so also abounded. Even as so many opportunities for anger, hatred, or tyranny have risen, so too the opportunities for laying down our lives for the sake of the family of God.




The objection that arises in our hearts becomes one of trust. When we hear of what love is, that there is cost associated, and we see the life of Christ, we may actually be discouraged. If Jesus’ life is what love is, then that puts us in a position of vulnerability. I don’t mean vulnerability like “let's make a safe space and have a conversation”. I mean the very real and present danger that others will take advantage of you.




Love costs something. It costs our comfort, our earthly peace of mind, our worldly positions of strength, our visible power. Love willingly submits to the plans of another. If we’re paying attention to Christ’s life and the relationship of the Trinity, we see this time and time again. That the Son submits to the Father time and time again. We don’t like submission. We don’t like losing control. We don’t like putting ourselves in a position to be taken advantage of.




We worry that if we love, someone may misuse our gifts. We worry that if we love we may never recoup the cost. We worry that if we love, that love may not be reciprocated. We worry that if we love, we will lose face. We worry that if we love we may suffer betrayal. We worry that loving may not be worth it. We worry that we may have to forsake worldly behaviors. We worry that love is going to cost us what we know. We worry that our love may not be received.




As these worries arise, we must look to Jesus. You may say, yes, Jesus I’m looking at the life of Jesus and seeing that his love suffered all of these things! His love was not always reciprocated, his love had a great cost, his love was misused by Judas, he lost face before his family, his friends, and his society, he suffered betrayal, he forsook all the pleasures the world had to offer, John 1:11 tells us that he went to his own, and his own did not receive him. You may say, Jacob, I’m looking at Jesus and his love and I don’t want to live that life.




I want to remind you, and warn you of the binary language that John uses. There is the family of the evil one, and the family of God. There are the works of the devil, and the works of the Son who came to destroy the works of the devil. There are the unrighteous like Cain, and the righteous like Abel.




In the famous 14th century chinese story “romance of the three kingdoms”, the warlord Cao Cao, who is etched into the story as a cunning, evil, cruel, and ruthless villain, remarks “I would rather betray the world, than have the world betray me”. This is the opposite of the mindset Jesus had. Jesus saw the betrayal of the world coming, he knew his love would not be reciprocated, he knew what Isaiah prophesied, that he would be despised and rejected. Jesus submitted himself to the betrayal of the world, and seized the opportunity to secure his love for his people for eternity. Now, the people of God had opportunities because of Christ’s love.




These opportunities to love in deed and truth John says, are how we shall know that we are “of the truth”. This is how, in moments of doubt, in times of uncertainty, we can be assured that we have confidence before God. Notice, what John doesn’t say, and pay careful attention to what he does say.

John doesn’t say that we can have confidence before God because we’re basically good. John doesn’t say that we can have confidence before God because we’ve achieved a satisfactory level of self loathing.




John does say that whenever our hearts condemn us, God is greater than our heart, and he knows everything. This statement should have two effects for us. On the one hand, God knows everything. This is a statement that should cause us to tremble in the Lord’s presence. God knows everything. He knows all there is to know about us. Our own hearts won’t be able to condemn us for all that we deserve to be condemned for. God knows all and that should cause us to repent. That repentance leads to cleansing. As our Pastor reminded us last week, John already has said in chapter 1:9 that if we confess our sins, God is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.




On the other hand, God knows everything and if our hearts do not condemn us, then we can have confidence before God who is even greater than our hearts! This confidence is what we ought to carry with us even as we enter into his presence with singing, and come before him with praise. This isn’t a confidence of self deception like what John warned about in 1:8 claiming that we have no sin. Rather this is a confidence that our sin, not in part but the whole, has been nailed to the cross and we bear it no more! This isn’t an arrogant confidence of someone who has never mis-stepped. This is a childlike confidence that our father in heaven has made right our wrongs.




So as we pray, we pray confidently to our father in heaven, as his children, knowing that he knows everything, knowing that we seek to do what pleases our heavenly father. We do what pleases God by obeying his commandment, which here in verse 23 John states is to believe in the name of his Son Jesus Christ and love one another as Jesus commanded us. Abiding in God is found in keeping this commandment. Believing in the name of the Son of the Father Jesus Christ, loving one another as he commanded us.




Christ’s command is a loving command. A command to love one another. Love isn’t “free”. Loving someone is a commitment to action. Loving someone always costs something. That doesn’t always mean the cost is a bad thing. Loving someone will cost pride. Love will cost you all of your prejudice. Love will cost you of your lust. Love will cost you all of your independence. Love is the complete surrendering of your own rights, priorities, and motives, for the sake of the one whom you love.




In the parable of the good Samaritan, we see several people walk over, around, or avoid loving the person who is injured. The one who loves the injured traveler, pays a price. That one paid in his resource, his time, his money. That one who loved paid his pride, his status, and his prejudice. That one loved by paying the price of laying aside his own priorities, to prioritize the one whom he was loving.




Christ loved us, and he showed us the way. His love cost him much, and his love gained so much. His love is our guide. His love is not foreign to us, it is not unknown. As John has been saying time and time again throughout the letter, this is no new command. This is what we have heard from the beginning of our faith.




When we believe in Christ, we keep God’s command. When we love one another, we keep God’s command. When we keep God’s command, we know that he abides in us through his Spirit. It is Christ’s Holy Spirit who indwells his people. The family of God is marked by the internal dwelling of God himself among his people through Christ’s Holy Spirit.




Dearly beloved of God, this week, as you experience the hardships ahead, as you experience the hatred of the world, as you are tempted to despair, remember that you are not alone. You are a child of God. You are indwelled by God's Holy Spirit.